The Adjusted Life {onions}

The bad stuff:
Onions (especially raw), onion powder

The good stuff:
Leeks, scallions, and shallots

I can't tell you how sad I was about this one, but have been surprised at how successful I've been. I use a lot of shallots now. I find that being able to use shallots really does satisfy my love of onion flavor. What a relief!

I do eat onions every now and then when ordering food at a restaurant. I don't worry about that part too much, and it doesn't generally bother me.

Friday Five

1. We've decided to change up Gus' room. Yes, our cat has a room. What? Doesn't every cat? We are going to be getting rid of the single bed in that room. It's not usuable with Gus in there anyway, so it's just taking up space and being generally useless. We are getting a new piece of kitty furniture - a nice tall cat tree. I bought some new plastic tubs to better organize the stuff in there. Gus loves jumping up on them, so it will be fine if they sit out in the room. Gus isn't spoiled. Nope!

2. We received a package in the mail from my mom this week containing some Heralife products. I'm looking forward to mixing up a bunch of different yummy shakes.

3. I helped organize a cornhole tournament at work this week. We had 32 teams sign up! Good times.

4. I had a horrible migraine this week. It was bad on Tuesday and terrible on Wednesday. It was mostly gone on Thursday (finally). I haven't had a migraine that bad in quite a while.

5. We are going on vacation soon. I'm really looking forward to it. And by that I mean, I'm counting the days. Ah yes, the pool, beach, and relaxation. Fun dinners out with Rusty. It cannot come soon enough. We need some time off in a bad way.

The Adjusted Life {nuts}

All nuts (such as pistashios, walnuts, cashews, pecans, almonds, coconut) are potential triggers because they contain tyramine. I should also avoid peanuts and peanut butter  (which are actually legumes and not nuts...who knew).

I don't eat a lot of nuts, but I do love peanuts and peanut butter (especially when the peanut butter is combined with chocolate...oh yum). Bummer.

Seeds, such as pumpkin and sunflower seeds, are fine.

The Adjusted Life {meats}

Processed meats and fish

The bad:
Aged, canned, cured, fermented, marinated, smoked, or tenderized.

The good:
Young and fresh is best.

Nitrates and nitrites are the big triggers here, along with MSG in some cases. Examples of the meats and fish that I need to avoid are: hot dogs, sausage, salami, pepperoni, bologna, lunch meat, beef jerky, certain hams, bacon, and smoked salmon.

Some stores offer meats without nitrates and nitrites (and with less MSG). I guess I would have to be bold and start asking at the deli counter, or start reading labels. I don’t know about you, but I find that those labels can be hard to decipher!

I’m really sad to have to give up sausage and bacon for any length of time, but can live without the others for quite a while. I’m of the mind that you either love bacon or you’re wrong. Honestly, how can you not love bacon?! But I digress. :)

The Adjusted Life {bread}

Fresh Breads

The bad stuff:
Anything less than one day old, including bagels, donuts, and pizza dough.

The good stuff:
Anything two or more days old.

When I first saw fresh bread on the list of triggers, I was worried that I could never eat a sandwich again! I’m not a huge sandwich girl, but I do like to have them on occasion. Having said that, I can see a typical easy lunch for me quickly becoming a turkey sandwich…where I roast a turkey tenderloin and slice it myself, since I can’t have deli meat.

I don’t eat a lot of fresh bread, but I do enjoy it. And I guess I won’t be able to stop for a bagel or donut…or get a pizza on the way home. Pizza is actually a huge no-no anyway, what with all the cheese and pepperoni and onions and more. Again, I don’t eat pizza very often, but I do enjoy having it on occasion.

The Adjusted Life {dairy}

I have already talked about cheese and headaches, but there are other dairy products to discuss. Like with cheese, tyramine is the potential problem compound.

The bad stuff:
Yogurt, sour cream, buttermilk

The good stuff:
Milk, cream, butter, and ice cream

I've cut out yogurt - even the ever yummy Chobani black cheery Greek yogurt that I had come to love. The only time I really used buttermilk was for bake "fried" chicken, so it isn't a big deal to cut that out. I'll miss sour cream the most out of the bad dairy items.

I was thrilled to find out, however, that I can have milk, cream, and butter! I don't eat ice cream that often, so I'm only moderately happy about that one. I was really afraid that all dairy would be banned for me.

The Adjusted Life {cheese}

Cheese – tyramine is the potential problem in cheese

The bad stuff:
Aged cheeses - Blue cheese, brie, cheddar, stilton, feta, gorgonzola, muenster, Parmesan, Swiss, processed cheese

The good stuff:
Young cheeses – cottage cheese, ricotta, cream cheese, and good quality American cheese

The in-between stuff:
Relatively young cheeses – fresh goat cheese and mozzarella

I love cheese.

I love food smothered in melted cheese. I love grilled cheese sandwiches... Yes, I love cheese.

I lessened the amount of cheese I use almost two years ago after joining Weight Watchers. I still enjoy having light string cheese and Laughing Cow Swiss wedges as snacks. They are great little bits of low-fat protein that compliment my Weight Watchers lifestyle.

In the last month, I have almost completely given up cheese. I've had a few small...tiny...minuscule amounts of cheese in the last few weeks.

I'm already looking forward to introducing cheese back into my diet to see if I react to it at all. Silly me. That's still more than a month away! From what I understand, however, aged cheese is one of the major triggers. One of the biggies. Time will tell if it is a biggie for me.

The Adjusted Life {caffeine}

Caffeine - Coffee, tea, chocolate, cocoa, and certain medications.

I have already given up Diet Coke and will be working on switching to decaf coffee soon. I will also have to stop drinking iced tea when we are out to eat. I guess my main drink while eating out will be water. I like my water, but it can get boring. I’ll have to look forward to have my (decaf) iced tea at home.

When my doctor brought up the caffeine in chocolate, I whined, "Really? Chocolate?!"

He laughed and said, "One step at a time, right?"

Right!

And this is just one of the first steps. It already seems so hard! I have given up caffeine before, however, so I know I can do this. The thought that this has to be pretty permanent is what’s getting to me.

I know, I know…this is just the beginning. Yikes!

Out of the Shadows

I had my first migraine when I was 10 years old. I have been managing migraines and other headaches (tension, sinus, hormone) ever since. About a month ago I woke up and decided that I was done living like this. Why am I putting up it? Why am I living this way? Because I know I don’t have it as bad as some other people? That’s just silly, Rachel! It affects your way of life. Do something about it!

And so I am.

I met with my doctor and he asked me if I have ever actually been diagnosed with migraines. I said no. He then asked me why I think I get migraines. I smiled as I pulled out a piece of paper that contained a list of triggers, symptoms, descriptions of pain, and more.

My doctor looked at the list and asked me, "Are you sure you don't work in the medical field?" Ha!

I left the appointment with a prescription and instructions to work on getting rid of possible trigger foods. The list is a long one.

Some of the foods are:

• Additives found in aged, canned, cured or processed meats (nitrites, nitrates, tyramine?)
• Aged cheese
• Aspartame and other artificial sweeteners
• Avocados
• Caffeine
• Certain beans
• Certain Fruit
• MSG
• Chocolate
• Cultured dairy products, sour cream, buttermilk, yogurt
• Olives and pickles
• Onions
• Peanuts, peanut butter, other nuts and seeds
• Pizza
• Potato chip products
• Smoked or dried fish
• Canned soups and broths
• Sourdough bread, fresh baked yeast goods
• Sugar

There are many days where all I want is to lie down in a dark quiet room. If I’m being completely honest, I am a little afraid that giving up certain foods forever will leave me a deprived and depressed mess. Cheese? Bacon? Onions? Chocolate? Say it isn’t so! No really, please tell me that I will be able to eat those things again before I start sobbing! I may be tempted to crawl back into my comfy bed in my dark quiet room. Except life and work don’t afford me that option very often. And it isn’t what I ultimately want.

I want to come out of the shadows. I want to live in the bright light of day with all its hustle and bustle, and without fear of pain or struggle.

I plan on blogging quite a bit about my headaches and all the things that I need to adjust, temporary and permanent. You get to be along for the ride. Lucky you.

Modifiable

I recently took a health risk assessment questionnaire with my employer’s health insurance. Taking this assessment will save me $500 on my health insurance next year. The assessment asks questions about blood pressure, weight, eating and exercising habits, and so on. At the end it tells you if you are at risk for anything from cancer to heart disease to strokes.

What struck a chord with me was that what I am at risk for are considered modifiable risk factors. I can do something about them…making an appointment, eating better, exercising…it’s in my power to change and minimize my risk factors.

Convicting much?

Oof.

This really is something I will battle forever. What can I say…I love food and not exercise.

Lord, help me love you above all else. Help me make good and healthy choices, and avoid the bad ones. Strengthen my resolve and my will-power. Amen!

5 Confessions of a Food-aholic

1. The first one is a biggie and a difficult one to put out there. I’ve gained 5 pounds in the last 3-4 weeks. Ouch. I’m thoroughly unhappy with myself, but I guess vacations and my birthday were bound to leave their mark. Now I have to find my way back to having positive motivation.

2. I have been pretty much snacking indiscriminately. It’s bad. What’s portion control again? I don’t think I’ve ever heard of that.

3. I didn't go to weigh-in on Saturday. I don’t want it to become a habit, but I just really didn’t want to see how much I gained since the last time I was there…a month ago. I’m already down enough about having to pull out some bigger capris.

4. I have not been meal planning. Big mistake. Meal planning is much harder to do when on vacation, but I should at least be doing that at home. I’ve had great intentions, but I’ve failed miserably. Time to put on my thinking cap!

5. I have been over indulging in sweet things. Oh my. And now that I’m used to eating all these sugar-laden goodies, it’s hard to retrain my taste buds to be satisfied with less or even *gasp* without.

In conclusion, I’ve been a bad bad girl. Please tell me I’m not alone in my vacation-induced weight gain. Please?

The Donut Connection

Did you know that the devil knows what kind of donuts I like? He does.

One day, in the midst of a making other bad food choices instead of going to God with my issues, I went in search of a donut. I had heard via the office grapevine that there was a box of sweet donuts down the hall.

Did I need a donut? No.
Was I hungry? No.
Was I going to eat it for no good reason? Yes.

I walked down the hall and looked in the donut box. Behold!

The only thing left was a strawberry frosted donut! I ♥ strawberry frosted donuts. I snatched it up and took a bite, anticipating the tender sweetness. One more clue that I should not have eaten it – the donut was stale. As I was eating this stale donut, I wondered if it was all a set up.

Could the devil possibly know what kind of donut I would find irresistible? I would say this is proof that he does indeed. The devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10a). He wants to break me down physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

How can I still be surprised to realize that the devil has been working hard to challenge my weight loss efforts? That should be a no brainer by now. I was made for more than this struggle with, and reliance on, food.

Jesus, on the other hand, came to give me a full life (John 10:10b). He wants to build me up with the amazing hope and power that comes from him alone (Ephesians 1:18-19).

There is a connection here that I need to be better at making. Tempting sugary donuts promise to fulfill me and the devil tells me that food can manage to do that on a level far above what is logical – even though it feels logical in the moment of extreme craving. Cravings that are a result of stress, sadness, boredom, and more. The connection I need to chase after, the one that is truly fulfilling, is a deeper and more meaningful relationship with God.

Today, instead of being the lies whispered to me when I am feeling defeated and worthless, I will believe what God tells me I am.

I am a daughter of the King (Romans 8:15).
I am a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17-18).
I am free (Romans 8:1-2).
I am holy (Ephesians 1:4, Colossians 1:22).

Cupcake Dreamin'

You know how I gave up dessert for lent?

Well, Saturday I was looking online at fancy schmancy cupcakes to order once the fast is over. Amazing, scrumptious, and decadent cupcakes!

Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry, oh my!

Saturday night I had a crazy dream about dessert. Serves me right for day dreamin' about cupcakes right before bed.

I was at some sort of church ladies function. I walked into the dining room and the table was covered with decadent desserts of all types. The hostess urged me to dig in and I obliged. It started with just a bite, and before I knew it I was shoving cupcakes and cookies and chocolate into my mouth as fast as I could chew.

Oh, it was good. Sinfully good.

In a split second, I remembered that I was fasting dessert.

Busted.

I had a choice to make. There I was, mouth full of sweets like a chipmunk and a treat in each hand. What was I going to do? I hesitated. I chewed as I thought, ‘If I blew it this bad I may as well keep going.’

Wow.

I kept going.

Ouch. I’m relieved that it was just a dream.

But isn’t that just like us as humans? We crave the wrong things. There is nothing wrong with eating a cupcake, but when I choose the cupcake over God I cross the line into sin. I joked last Friday about feeling like I was about to die of sugar deprivation. Sunday night I found myself asking, do I crave God that much? So much I would die without him? I should be.

It's time to restart checking my cravings. This morning. No more putting it off. When I feel that intense craving for food, I will pray that God helps me to crave HIM instead.

Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world - the cravings of sinful man, the lust of the eyes and the boasting of what he has and does - comes not from the Father but from the world.

~ 1 John 2:15-16

Friday Five

1.  The weather was glorious yesterday and will be again today. Oh weather, you are such a tease though! Tomorrow it shall be cool and windy (read: feel even colder). By next Tuesday we could have more snow showers. But today, today will be 70 degrees. Come on Spring! Come soon, please!

2.  I've been eating pretty much uncontrolably this past week. It has to stop. Sigh. I'm working on it - and praying about it. I just started a book called Made to Crave, and am praying that God uses it to speak to me about my food issues. I need help, cause I cannot do this on my own! I have only read part of chapter 1, and it is already hitting me where it hurts. I will probably blog about this journey.

3.  I'm trying to grow my hair out a bit. The top part is at a length that I CANNOT STAND. I pull it back every day beacuse it drives me crazy. I need to start googling hair styles to find what I like. I'm leaning towards a longer bob - maybe shoulder length - with bangs. I have to decide if I want any layers, where I want my part (probably middle), and how I want my bangs. I just want something different! Stay tuned for this very important decision.

4.  My coworker/parner in crime is on vacation for two week. In Hawaii. I may or may not be a wee bit jealous. I'll never say.

5.  I need to go to the gym tonight. I'm not saying that I will go, but I need to. Oh please God, help me go. That's the first step, right? Admitting that I need help, specifically, God's help? Help! I need the want-to. I wish I had the want-to. It just isn't there right now. I have been letting excuses keep me from doing what I should be doing. Sigh.

7 ways to eat healthier

1. Eat your fruits and vegetables. When I first joined Weight Watchers (WW), I struggled with how to get five servings of fruits and vegetables in a day. I have learned to eat one serving at breakfast or as my morning snack, two at lunch, one as an afternoon snack, and one or two at dinner. Buy what is in season, and you will get the best tasting fresh produce.

2. Watch your portion sizes. I know this seems like a no-brainer, but most of us eat way more than we need. Be honest with your portion sizes. Don't try and cheat. You are only hurting yourself.

3. Focus on making one good choice at a time. If you mess up and eat an entire bag of cookies in a fit of hormonal PMS, forgive yourself and move on. Make your next choice a super healthy one.

4. Find healthy snacks that you enjoy. I get the munchies often. Having a bunch of go to healthy snacks on hand keeps me from grabbing my husband's bag of chips.

5. Dairy - WW is all about fat-free dairy, which I mostly detest. I opt for reduced-fat or low-fat dairy. It is higher in WW point values, but it's worth it for me. Chose which ever you prefer, but eat/drink dairy every day. I adore Laughing Cow cheese and Sargento light string cheese.

6. Everything in moderation, that is my motto. I have never bought into fad diets that single out one thing. You need to be aware of it all, without focusing on just one thing. Calories, carbs, protein, fiber, fat... However, don't let these things overwhelm you. Here is where I think WW has a great program. It helps me see the overall picture of how healthy a food is without spending lots of time analyzing.

7. Allow yourself small treats of things you really love. I don't believe complete deprivation works - at least for me. Not at all.

And now to be a good girl

After weeks of barely keeping myself reigned in where eating is concerned, I am back to being a good girl.

I have gained about 5 pounds since mid-November. I do not feel too badly about this gain, and I am confident that I can lose those pounds plus about 10 more by eating right and working out.

I was off work today and sat down with my cookbooks and WW points calculator to come up with a shopping list. I came up with my plan of attack for the week...breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks. Lots of fruits and veggies.

I am feeling back in this, mentally speaking. That is where my biggest battle takes place - in my mind. Of course, I may say differently the second emotional eating kicks in.

I can do this!

80/20

I read in my weekly WW handout about the 80/20 rule - 80% healthy choices and 20% indulgences. It was a reminder that I needed. When I first started out on WW in May I succeeded by making super healthy choices Monday through Friday, and allowing for some indulgences on Saturday and Sunday. It worked really well for me. I felt like I was suceeding without being deprived.

The last month or so I have been struggling and my weight loss (or lack thereof) has shown it. I feel like reading again about the 80/20 rule helped me remember what worked for me earlier on. I feel like I'm back on track. Woot!

Back in the saddle

I've been remiss for the last two weeks - I haven't been writing down what I've been eating. BIG WW no-no. Today I will begin again. Luckily, I've been keeping mental tallies on most days and I've still managed to lose weight. Phew! But it is time for me to kick my butt in gear once more. I will do my prep work, planning, and thinking ahead. That is a huge part of success for me. I will track honestly and still allow myself treats. Tonight my ILs are taking us to dinner for my birthday. I asked to go to a chain restaurant that has some WW and lower cal dinners. That should make dinner relatively easy.

Breakfast
1 - coffee
1 - orange
1 - wedge of cheese

Lunch
4.5 - 4 small zucchini patties
1 - 1 cup watermelon

Dinner
7 - grilled shrimp with rice
1 - seasonal veggies

That leaves me with 4.5 points for the day. I might eat a birthday cupcake (3 pt) and a couple fries off of my hubby's plate tonight (1.5 pt). And there you have it, 21 points for the day!

I have bean burrito stuff already at work, and will take the leftover zucchini patties and some watermelon to work this week. Breakfasts are already thought out as well. Should be a good week! Here's to more weight loss!